As an airline captain and licensed therapist, I've specialized in the treatment of flight anxiety for over thirty years. The problem is that our most basic way to regulate feelings of uncertainty/anxiety/fear, etc. is to use our own two feet and back off, or even run if the danger is extreme.
A part of your brain, the sub-cortex, learns by repetition to do routine tasks. This leaves higher level thinking, called executive function, free to do decision-making. For example, your subcortex can drive the car while you are deciding where to stop for lunch.
Meanwhile, the amygdala is monitoring everything going on around you. It is dividing everything into "routine" or "non-routine". If routine, it takes no action, and leaves the sub-cortex on the job. If non-routine, an assessment needs to be made to determine whether the non-routine situation is an opportunity, irrelevant, or a threat.
If another car drifts into your lane, the amygdala recognizes the non-routine situation and releases stress hormones. The stress hormones shove thoughts about lunch aside and focus all of your attention on the car coming into your lane.
Executive function now does three things. Think A-B-C.
A. Assessment: it assesses the situation (to determine what is likely to happen if you do nothing).
B. Build A Plan: it decides what you need to do to avoid a collision.
C. Commit: it commits to carry out that plan.
At the moment of commitment, a signal is sent to the amygdala telling it to stop releasing hormones. In addition to escape, that is how the mind regulates the stress hormones that cause feelings of anxiety, fear, etc.
The problem with flying is that you can't use the A-B-C system to get relief from the stress hormones nor can you escape. So the answer is to train the mind (in the days before your flight) to NOT release stress hormones when you are on the plane.
To learn about this and to get lots of free help, I have a free app at http://www.fearofflying.com/app and if you want to spend a few bucks, get my book, SOAR, The Breakthrough Treatment for Fear of Flying at http://goo.gl/znkTlp and while you are there read the reviews, most of which are five star.
The best way to get over your fear of flying is to remember that you aren't really flying. The girls underneath you, in nearly all stunts with the exception of basket tosses, will always have their hands on your feet, or following them, in a twisting stunt like a 360. Trust that they will catch you, get spotters until you are confident, and here's a big one: if and when you fall, fall clean! Don't flail and freak out. Fall tight and in one place so that your bases can catch you easier. Flyers get hurt when they flip out and their bases are unable to catch them.
In the air do not look down it really helps and shrug your shoulders so its easier on tbe people carrying you to not be scared dont think about just try locking out (being stiff) and its easier you should trust the people carrying you
I had a fear of swimming or deep water until I saw some kids swimming in deep water at a water park and my fears were cured. I use the, if he/she can do it, I can do it. Book a short flight and sit next to a women or a kid and watch their actions and see how calm they are and that should help a lot. I mean, you don't want to be seem as less inferior than a woman or a kid, right?
