It seems that you are particularly interested with the grappling arts, and given your traumatic experience it might be good idea to not start off with the striking arts. So any good Judo, Bjj, JJJ or Aikido school would suit you.
Good luck, take it easy and avoid the Mcdojos
A few comments regarding Aikido specifically and martial arts generally:
1.) Aikido is a grappling art. IE - it's not strikes but throws, pins and holds. That means there is a great deal of physical contact. Particularly at the beginning stages of training, most techniques start with static grabs which then move on to more dynamic applications over time. If you decide to take classes, the first time you partner up with another student, it will most likely be a senior which by itself might be intimidating and the first thing they will do is grab your wrist
If you are uncomfortable with physical contact, understand that training starts off with exactly that - physical contact. On the other hand, perhaps you might find that helpful... it's very controlled and nobody is forcing anyone to do anything (this point should be true of any art in any dojo) - in Aikido it will simply be your partner grabbing your wrist, stepping into your blind spots at close quarters....
Go watch a class before you jump on the mat - you might be intrigued or might not. Either way, at least you know what to expect ahead of time.
Don't be intimidated - yes, you'll feel like an idiot and be uncomfortable regardless of any physical contact issues. That's the nature of it - everyone's first class felt like that: the Sensei and the other students that you work with know exactly how you feel - they've been there themselves.
2.) Is Aikido useful? No more or less than any other method. From a practical perspective, yes, it takes longer to learn the art well enough to be effective but at the end of the day, the biggest variable is the person studying rather than the art. A gifted person will pick any style up faster than a normal person and a normal person will take a longer time by comparison.
3.) A good deal of 'how effective it will be' also depends on the particular school. Many schools look at training as a self defense method. Many others look at training as a way of living where the art is a learning tool. Many others are somewhere in the middle.
Consider not just a given style (be it Aikido, BJJ, Karate, Escrima, whatever) but also consider the school itself meaning in particular the attitude of the Sensei and the senior students. There are no 'wrong' answers in their attitudes but there should be a good match between what they offer and your personal goals mentally and physically (and emotionally considering you mentioned anxiety).
4.) Regarding anxiety: one of the reasons many people train is to overcome things like anxiety, learn balance, being out of shape, etc.,.. Often, the self defense aspect is either not important or is simply an ancillary benefit - it was never a primary goal but becomes a nice take away.
We have a student in my dojo that has a few physical issues - poor reflexes, very bad balance, etc.,.. However, she has tenacity and so she just keeps showing up for class. Her balance is improving as are her reflexes as is her confidence. It's pretty cool to actually watch that happen over time but the biggest part is not what the school offers to her training but what she herself brings to her own training. The training is all hers and she owns it - she chooses the school as her environment to learn.
On the other hand, there are other students that are a bit more into the martial aspect and they train much harder and much more realistically. They also choose the same school as their environment to learn something entirely different. To each their own and when these two types of students train together, then a balance is reached that both can handle. They learn different lessons working together.
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Everyone has their own situation they come from - some are young and some are old, some are timid and some are proud, etc.,...
When the students train with each other, everyone ends up being challenged in some way. Personal buttons get pushed which is part of the point. If you are uncomfortable with physical contact and you avoid it, you will never become comfortable with physical contact. That doesn't mean you have to enjoy it per say, only that you can learn to handle it without having an anxiety attack. To learn that, you have to subject yourself to it and martial arts training. Be it Aikido or anything else, there are many ways to do that.
Ballroom dancing would be another one as far as becoming comfortable with physical contact goes but that doesn't sound like what you are looking for.
To be honest, the only real way to learn self defense is to have some if not any physical contact. Bjj would be great for your situation since you probably do not wan't to throw kicks and punches at people. Bjj helps you keep calm in situations that others would just ball up in fear, I too had anxiety before and ever since i started doing bjj it has slowly eased away with every class. Give it a try see what you think.
Aikido gets rubbished alot on these forums, I train in an MMA gym and we have an Aikido master there who using Aikido only can defeat pretty much anyone in the club via his use of choke holds, I have seen various Black Belts in various martial arts have a go at this guy and get it served back to them very quickly.
That said however there is nothing to be ashamed of in feeling that you do not want to participate in physical touch yet you wish to learn to defend yourself. Healing is a long process and we all walk that road at a different pace and your feelings should be respected. My advice to you is to have a look at the Japanese Martial Art called Iaido, it focuses on the use of the sword. Aikido takes its Sword forms from Iaido. My advice is to learn the sword first as the various sword forms also work with an empty hand and are able to be taken across into Aikido training at a later time when you feel ready.
Good luck with it anyway, don't give up and good on you for having a try to reach this goal, learning to defend yourself is the best positive way to change!
Boxing, kick boxing Muay Thai all have 'bare minimum physical contact'.. Caperio is Brazilian dance fighting an that usually has little physical contact til a fight even for I'm not sure how effective it is.. The top three leave you vunerable on the ground doe.. And if you were to get into a bad situation you would 8/10 would get a panic attack as the attacker would normally try grab you etc.. Best of luck and sorry to hear about you're bad experience..
You'll have to look around and see who teaches what around you.
My initial reaction was without physical contact there is no point in training. But I will add that some styles like Uechi Ryu don't have you do much physical work with a partner when you first start, but gradually add more and more as you advance. So you might want to look at some of the Okiniwan styles such as Goju Ryu, Uechi Ryu, Isshin Ryu, etc.
The most important thing is to find a good style with a good instructor. Tell them about your issue and they should be able to work with you.
No physical contact = no self defense. It's simple. That's technically running away. Are you expecting to make a thug fly without touching him?
Aikido isn't bad. You should try or do your research before reading other's opinions.
Can you learn swim without getting in the water? Can you learn to write without contacting the paper? Martial arts are no different, to learn to fight, you have to fight. Simple as that. Any martial art is good for self defense as long as you know how to apply it.
And for future reference, you can't believe everything you read.
- Hope this answers your question
Ehm..
This system teaches how to react to thiefs at home or in the street http://www.goobypls.com/r/rd.asp?gid=563...
It's the best and simples self defence program I found on the internet.
if you want to defend yourself against someone you have to be strong in both physically and mentally and if you do not want to contact physically so Tai Chi is the best art
I went through a traumatic experience and I'd like to learn a martial art for self defense. However, I'm not really comfortable with a lot of physical contact yet. Are there any options open that teach legitimately useful skills? I've read that BJJ is really useful, but the wrestling looks like it would give me an anxiety attack. On the other hand, I've heard things like Aikido would be useless for self defense until I've already been practicing for a decade. Are there any in between?
So basically you want to learn how to fight without fighting? I'm sorry but it doesn't work like that.
It's called, buying a gun
